The Rules and Regulations of having a fake boyfriend
by blahblahblah97
Summary: "Merlin's beard, I've done it now, Lily thought. I, Lily Evans, have hit rock bottom. Whether in a grief driven desperation, or I have indeed lost my marbles, either way I've hit a point of no return. I've done something reckless, impulsive, and downright stupid. I've made a deal with the devil, and there's no going back from this." T for very occasional swearing.


imagination

THE RULES AND REGULATIONS OF HAVING A FAKE BOYFRIEND.

Number 1:Don't let him get too attached.

Number 2:Act like a couple ONLY when there are other people around.

Number 3:When alone, you are JUST FRIENDS.

Number 4:Don't let him get handsy.

Number 5:People have to believe it's real, so you can't tell people it's fake. Especially Sirius.

Number 6(most important): DO NOT UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES FALL IN LOVE WITH HIM.

CHAPTER ONE:DEAL WITH THE DEVIL

**Merlin's beard, I've done it now, Lily thought.**

I, Lily Evans, have hit rock bottom.

Whether in a grief driven desperation, or I have indeed lost my marbles, either way I've hit a point of no return. I've done something reckless, impulsive, and downright stupid. I've made a deal with the devil, and there's no going back from this.

"Lily, are you sure about this?" Marlene asked doubtfully. Lily knew she was thinking that she'd gone bonkers. She was starting to think that herself. "Marly, I am one hundred percent sure." Lily confirmed. Her hands were still shaking with anger. Lily had just faced the ultimate betrayal. Her best friend, a person who she trusted with her life, had done the unspeakable. Serverus Snape, her best friend. Or so he was, called her a-

"Lily, Snape called you a mudblood. But really? This plan you and Alice have coined together is madness!" Marlene exclaimed, her blonde hair flying around her head. It took a lot to get Marlene worked up and anxious. This must be awful.

"It may be, but it's the PERFECT revenge," Alice says, grinning like a Cheshire cat. She looked far too gleeful about this, which probably wasn't a good thing, being honest. "It's perfect, Lily. The ultimate revenge! The best way to get him back. He hurt you so much, it's only fair to give it back in spades," she said firmly. Lily nodded, feeling more resolute in her decision. Alice was right. "I'm going," she said, feeling the need to do this now. "It's now or never, Lily."Alice said seriously. "We can't let him get away with this, can we Marly?" Alice turned her big doe eyes on their blonde friend, who was currently wearing a hole in the carpet and about to chew her lip off. "no," she agreed reluctantly. " we can't." She plopped down beside the two girls on the bed. "but you'll have to be thoroughly convincing."

Lily smiled. Marlene was on board. "I know," she replied, getting off Alice's bed and striding confidently towards the door. "Snape has eyes like a hawk," she offered.

"I know," Lily repeated. "I'll be convincing."

"you'll have to-"

"MARLENE!" Alice and Lily exclaimed in unison.

"Sorry, sorry!" Marlene muttered.

Alice rolled her eyes. "Go," she urged Lily. "I'll take care of the nervous wreck."

Lily smiled and disappeared out the door.

"You are evil," Marlene chastised, "making her do this."

Alice grinned slyly "If it gets them together, I don't care."

"Sirius!" Lily yelled, speed walking over to him, looking angry. Beside him, Peter let out a terrified squeak. An angry Lily is never a good Lily.

"Lily," Sirius greeted, which was followed by a rushed "whatever it is, I didn't do it."

"I don't care what you did," she said irritably, "I need to know where Potter is."

"Jamesy? YOU are seeking out JAMES? Are you under the imperio or something?" Sirius asked disbelievingly.

"No, I'm not, so just tell me where the hell he is!" she snapped, losing patience. Sirius sighed, and glanced at a parchment in his hand. "Did you try the library?"

Lily blinked. "The library? No. No, I didn't." she said sheepishly.

"He's in the library," Sirius confirmed, and Lily dashed off, not before watching him carefully stuff the parchment into his pocket and seeing a glint of silver in his hands.

James looked up from the table, un startled as she approached. "Lily," he greeted warily.

"How did you know-"

"A magic man never reveals his secrets." he replies, tapping the side of his nose.

"A magician," Lily corrected.

"Oh. Right." he said, shifting uncomfortably in his chair, knocking his knees off the wooden table. "Do you want to sit down?" he asked, half rising from his chair. Lily slid into the chair opposite him. "what are you doing here, anyway?" Lily asked curiously. "I thought you'd be on the Quidditch pitch."

He shot her an amused look. "Contary to popular belief, Evans, I do care about school work," said gesturing to his quill, ink and parchment. His smile disappeared. "listen, Lily, I'm sorry about earlier." Lily glanced up sharply to see his hands balled into fists. "If we hadn't-if I hadn't-he wouldn't have-I just want to-I'm so sorry. It's all my fault." He ran a hand through his already messy hair. Lily shook her head. "It wasn't your fault." she sighed, knowing it was the truth. Lily glanced around, making sure no one was near by. "But I have a preposition for you," she said, leaning over the table.

"Oh my." he said mildly.

"I need you're help." Lily admitted. James quirked an eyebrow.

"I'm in," he said simply. Lily shook her head. "You're going to want to know what it is first. And it's a deal."

James leaned forward. "Go on."

"Well," Lily began, "Ineedyoutobemyboyfriend," she blurted out. James frowned.

"what was that? Call me crazy, but I could swear you asked me to be your boyfriend," he laughed. Lily went beet root red, and he shut up. "well, fake boyfriend." she said. "I need you to help me hurt Seve-Snape. If there's anyone he hates, it's you."

"So that's why you need me." James stated. If Lily was seeing correctly, he almost looked hurt. "yes. But, I have something in return," she offered.

"And what's that? What exactly can you give me, Evans?"

"well, James," Lily started and James smiled slightly at her addressing him as something other than 'Potter' or 'toe rag'. "I will be your friend."

He had to take a moment to let that sink in. "You mean that? We would actually be friends?"

Lily let out a laugh. "Don't act so surprised." She held out her hand to him. "deal?" she asked hopefully.

James stood up, took her hand and pulled her up with him. "Deal."


End file.
